THE BIG 40!!

NOTICE MY POST IS IN BLACK TYPE TODAY!
Today is my birthday; I am 40 years old. I simply cannot wrap my mind around that number; I don't feel as if I should be this "old"! James has told me all day that I look very young for "my age"; I think that's supposed to make me feel better?! Jessica, 14, of course, tells it like it is; "you know, Mom, you'll start to get wrinkles now!" Trust me, they're there now, they're just easier to hide right SO FAR! And Jazmin tells me "you're so beautiful, Mommy!" Just makes me grab her up and squinch her in a hug.
She talks non-stop about Judi and what she will teach her; I hope the reality is as good as the anticipation. We are still waiting on the notice for our fingerprint appt; should have been here by now. I'm giving it til Monday, then I'm calling!
Debbie

HOMESTUDY WOES AND JAMES' BIRTHDAY!

Hi! Been a bit since my last post; a lot going on! While waiting for PA, we assumed our homestudy was being worked on; I found out at end of April, nothing had been done since our visit on March 26th. Turns out she was sick (I don't know with what) and wound up taking a leave of absence from work. I called and insisted that someone, anyone continue with it. A wonderful woman named Jan Motl, the supervisor, took it on, and we finally got to meet. There were a lot of changes necessary, and it took another 4 weeks! to get it all straightened out, signed, and notarized.
Finally, on this day, June 10th, which also happened to be my son, James',11th birthday, it was done! I (with all 3 kids in tow) drove to Kansas City to pick it up at the Catholic Charities office and then the plan was to take it 3 miles down the road to the State Dept to have it certified. Well, 45" later! I finally found the building (still had to call them and direct me while I was driving). So we go upstairs to get it done, and I'm "late"! It will take 2 to 3 hours to get one document certified! So here I am, in a stuffy government office, wondering what to do with 3 bored kids, and a birthday!
Well, one of the ladies must have been an angel, because she reminded me Crown Center was just a few blocks away! Hooray! We went and had a great time, ate at a restaurant where you order the food and a train brings it to you and it lowers to the table. The food is terrible (I thought), but the kids loved everything about it!
After that, we went back and got our now-certified homestudy and immediately drove another 20" to immigration in North Kansas City and dropped off the homestudy. Come on, fingerprint appointment!
Now, I just want to say, though I'm sure this wasn't the way James wanted to spend his birthday, all the kids were great and we managed to have some fun, too! We did celebrate with cake, ice cream, and presents that night, too. They are all realizing just how involved the adoption process is, even Jazmin. While she (nor I) doesn't understand WHY we need all this paperwork, when I tell her it's all so we can go get Judi, it seems to make the wait a little easier for her.

Yeah, we finally got it, after 72 days of agonizing waiting, the PA, or preliminary approval!! This means we have the green light to go ahead and submit the 'BIG" file, the dossier. I have it all ready, just waiting for the homestudy to be done. Then we can get our fingerprints and be on our way! Jazmin keeps getting on her toy cell phone and "calling" the "workers" in China to let them know we're coming in "10 hours" to get Judi; I wish! At least now I can finally put her picture here; doesn't she just have the cutest face! I "think" she's about 2 here.
Just yesterday, Jazmin said, "I'm getting taller to be a big sister, am I, Mommy?" She talks about the things she will show Judi and even says what she WON'T show her, lol! Now if I could just get that across to the big kids!
Now that we have PA, I feel I can really start working on Jazmin's room, putting organizers in there, getting it all set up for two sweet little girls! I'm trying to sell stuff to raise money to buy the things I need for in there instead of using the loan; have to find some time to get stuff on Ebay and it's garage sale season!i

UGH! STILL WAITING FOR THAT DARN PA!

Ugh! Still waiting for that darn PA! Day 49! Two families adopting from the same agency list got theirs last week and our paperwork (LOI) went in about a week later, so I'm really hoping this week is our turn!
Today at 1, we have ALL 4 of our homestudy visits! I'm so excited to have it all out of the way; this will shave about 6 weeks off our time frame, I hope. All the kids are asking when are we going to get Judi!? I try to explain the process of paperwork to them, but they just want their sister home. It's really sweet that they already consider her part of the family.
Will post later about how the home visit went....

GETTING CLOSER TO PA!!!!

It's been awhile since my last posting mainly because I've been frantically paperchasing and then I forgot my own username and password to get back here!
Here's the latest: after my last post, we were 13 days into the wait for PA. What is PA, you ask? This is Preliminary Approval. Once we were "matched" with our little Judi, we had to submit 4 things, a summary of basic information about our family, a letter stating how we would care for Judi and what medical/educational resources we would utilize, an application, and of course, a small preliminary fee. All these documents are sent to China to the CCAA, the China Center of Adoption Affairs, who reviews it and hopefully, issues the "PA".
In the meantime, I've been getting together our dossier; this is the BIG file that goes to China after we get PA. It includes such things as our homestudy, financial info, police records, employer letters, etc. I'll explain more about that for my family and friends as we go along. The only glitch in the whole thing so far has been the reaction from a few people, which has been way different from the reaction to our first adoption, I think because we chose Special Needs this time. A couple of our acquaintances are pretty negative about it, so I am careful about sharing adoption news with them. Thankfully, there are still lots of people I can share my happiness and excitement with. It's hard for me to understand how opening your heart and home to an orphan can ever be viewed as negative. I just ask God for His strength and know that this is His plan for our life.
We have had really great news this month. All we knew about Judi was what her medical file from the adoption agency contained. We had no more information after Sept. 2007. We learned about a lady that knew another lady in China who could "ferret" out more information for us. We heard from her this week and got GREAT NEWS! Judi is apparently showing no signs of any physical or mental delays (YEAH!), is potty-trained (double YEAH!), likes dolls and toy cars (James is excited about this as he has about 200 hot wheels!), likes candy (dental visit in the cards!), and is somewhat afraid of strangers (Gotcha Day should be veeery interesting!). She's 36.6 inches tall, and weighs about 28 lbs. However, we are keeping in mind that any info coming out of China is not necessarily 100% ironclad, so we're going to go to get her with completely open minds and expecting anything..
Jazzy is so excited about Judi! She asks every day when we will go get her! Part of me wishes we wouldn't have said anything until we had official PA, but her (Jazzy's) adoption decision was made as a family and we followed suit with Judi's. We would never have pursued adopting again if the whole family hadn't been on board; Jessica and James are such open-hearted kids; they already refer to Judi as "my new sister", the same way they did with Jazmin. And I'm sorry to brag, but I have to say that Jazmin herself is one incredible kid! Every day I thank God countless times for allowing me to be her mother; she truly is a gift and we can't imagine life without her.
We have found out that Judi is in a foster family also, complete with an older (foster) sister. Though this will be hard on her to leave them, we hope to be able to stay in contact with them and send them pictures throughout the years. With Jazzy traveling to China with us, we're hoping her presence will ease Judi's grief at saying goodbye to her foster family.
Day 44 in the wait for PA! Arrrgh! Two people adopting from our agency list got their PA early this week and we're about 6 days behind them, so keep your fingers crossed for next week!
For my family and friends: I can't post pictures of Judi until I have PA, so if you want to see her, go to www.adoptionhouse.org, click on "International" on the left side of the screen. Then click "China Special Needs", then "Available Children". Judi is almost at the bottom of the list under the name "Ruby".
Til next time!

BEGINNINGS

I feel kind of bad as I start this because I didn't do this for our first adoption. So this blog will be the story of Jazmin AND Judi as we pursue Judi's adoption and they become sisters. First, a little about our family. We are the Cavenders: there is my husband, JR, and I (Debbie), my oldest bio daughter, Jessica (13), my bio son, James III (10), and Jazmin, our youngest at 4 1/2, adopted on Nov. 15, 2004 at 17 months old. We adopted her using Holt International, and from the day of application to Gotcha Day, it took 20 months. When we went to bring her home, she was not a happy camper for 3 days! She would not stand, crawl, smile, or let me go! Didn't like Daddy at all! She was a very quiet, withdrawn baby and would really not interact with anyone but me. After 3 days, our guide gave her some medicine to make her poop; that night, she walked for the first time; I cried. After that, she never looked back! Her beautiful personality just started blossoming; she was funny, and sweet, and just knocked her brother and sister's socks off when we came home. I had been afraid that I would not love her as much as my biological children, but when they placed her in my arms, I was overwhelmed. She was ours, clear and simple.
Now she is the light of all our lives and so excited about her sister-to-be, Judi Elizabeth. The idea of adopting again and adding a fourth child to our family is scary, but we have spent countless hours in prayer and believe this is God's plan for our life. We found Judi on the SN photolisting at Adoption House, her list name is "Ruby". She is almost 3 (April). We are currently LOI and 13 days into the wait for PA. Paperchasing has begun in earnest. Please follow along with us on our journey to bring Judi home to us.

Introduction

Follow along with us on a wonderful journey to China to bring home our fourth child, Judi Elizabeth. We have been to China already once to bring home Jazmin Xiu at 17 months old. She is now 4 3/4 and very excited about having a little "mei-mei" to be pals with.
We have spent about a year praying about the decision to adopt again. Adding a fourth child seemed like an impossibility at first. THe more we prayed, however, the more it seemed right. We always said we wanted 4 kids, we just didn't know God intended for us to build our family in a non-traditional way!
So we searched and searched for just the right little girl; we had an idea of the special needs we felt we could take care of. So of course, when we found Judi, her special need was one we had never even imagined. After careful review of her file by medical people and some input from folks who have Been There, Done That, and yes, more prayer, we decided to go for it. As I go on to explain in our first entry, this is not just Judi's story, but Jazmin's as well as she will be traveling with us to China to bring Judi home.
Judi's Chinese name is Wu Wang Rou and she is in foster care in Kunming, China. Her special need is listed as "encephalatrophy", which is basically atrophy of the brain. Sounds scary, I know. She had a bout of encephalitis at 7 months old which caused some structural changes to her brain, hence the "atrophy" label. According to all the reports we've gotten, however, she is doing just fine and is developmentally on target for a 3 year old; while we are mentally preparing for any outcome, we are thankful that God has shown his grace so far on this little one!

Debbie